Three of Coins

Two is a coincidence, three is a pattern… three wishes… celebrity deaths come in threes or two-thousand-sixteens…

after the beep

“Hello, this is Hector from Hector the Spectre Collector. Unfortunately, we are all booked up until next week. If you …

Ten of Wands

Uh, hi, tarot blogger lady? It’s Colin. One of the ghosts? We didn’t interrupt your last post! That voice in …

Two of Fish

beware. beware! fear the coming darkness.

Ten of Coins

You have many stories to tell. No one listens anymore.

14. Temperance

The rocks are slippery. Recovery is slippery. Angels hate getting their down feathers wet.

31. Punctuality

If an oracle tells you that you will be devoured by sharks tomorrow at 3:16 p.m. and 47 seconds, do not drive further inland! Humanity barely survived the last four sharknado tragedies.

Seven of Wands

To avoid ultimate defeat, wise Tarot readers will insist that you do something monumentally stupid upon pulling a seven.

The House

“We will (grudgingly) stop wailing obscenities in your ears at three in the morning. This is a big sacrifice for us. Your reactions are priceless! Oh man, we wish you could see how you look! What a bunch of dweebs!”

Three of Lizards

Chamaeleonids are especially tickled pink by the opportunity.

Dame of Swords

What? No! Wrong way! We’ll be run over by massive fifteenth century carts with lift kits and fake nuts tied to the back!

January 20, 2017

If you’re reading this from the future (yay, that means the internet still works!)…

One Hundred Posts

It has come to my attention that today marks the one-hundredth Terrible Tarot post. I, and the nice young woman who uploads my humble scribblings, would like to thank our readers, all four of you.

Eight of Coins

In the Sola Busca version, (featured above) the carver is finished. Finished, as in pecked clean by the crows, one of which still lurks on a branch above.

(a post that is short and unsweet)

22. The Woods

If you go down to the woods today, you’re sure of a big surprise. If you go down to the woods today, you’d better go in disguise, for every bear that ever there was will gather there together because we have been encroaching upon their natural habitat and the wilderness hungers for vengeance.

16. The Tower (second attempt)

Avoid the temptation of negative thought. Avoid the naivete of positive thought. Avoid thought. Avoid perception. Avoid the word “doom”. Under no circumstances should you allow yourself to have a nightmare. Sleep well.