Placement: The Negligible Arcana
Description: An octopus poses in a crown and often other adornments such as a necklace or an Elizabethan ruff. The background is left either blank white or as black as The Void.*
Right side up:
There are things you are not meant to know, not because the knowledge is illicit but because you are you and your brain is only capable of so much. An octopus is a cephalopod, a word that means “head foot.” The Queen of Octopus has her ear to the ground, listening to the deep chaotic maelstrom that is destiny.
She knows who painted a heart symbol on Pluto’s surface, and for whom the heart was intended. She knows the secret language shared by rats, budgerigars and robotic space opera characters. She knows why yawning is contagious. She knows the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. She knows why moths are drawn to flames. She knows the trajectory of any butterfly effect. She knows the contents of your partner’s deleted browser history, which is not so much sordid as it is baffling. She knows about the dreams you forget upon waking. She knows why humans sleep. She knows when you, a specific human, are sleeping, and when you are awake and also how Santa can breech the perimeter of a double-locked, seventeenth floor condo of a thirty-second story highrise upon which there is a distinct lack of chimney.
You do not want to know.
*See The Void, a card found in the Obscure Arcana… eventually. I have not yet posted on the subject of this card.
Classic Queen of Octopus deaths:
Mislaid information leading you into the wrong place, e.g.
- Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan
- Cosmos Redshift 7
- A suburb of the astral plane
At the wrong time, e.g.
- God’s trimillennial dice tournament
- May Day
- Venusian eclipse
- Street cleaning night
- When every single one of your library books are due