Tarot

Queen of Cups

Perhaps she regrets leaving her bathing suit in the beach bag she forgot by the door

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1. The Magician

The Magician card represents what we in divination circles like to call “mad skills.”

Damsel of Wands

Your autobiography will read like an off-brand book of Mad Libs.

Ten of Wands

Uh, hi, tarot blogger lady? It’s Colin. One of the ghosts? We didn’t interrupt your last post! That voice in …

14. Temperance

The rocks are slippery. Recovery is slippery. Angels hate getting their down feathers wet.

Seven of Wands

To avoid ultimate defeat, wise Tarot readers will insist that you do something monumentally stupid upon pulling a seven.

The Troll

Dear Terrible Tarot,

What the hell do you think you’re doing? You’re making everything about death, even the Death card, WHICH IS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT CHANGE. No one will read Tarot cards if they think it’s all disasters and [word deleted].